This is a poem I wrote a while ago when I was having a really big flare. It was at a time when I didn’t talk much about my disease. I felt ashamed because most people didn’t understand how I could look so healthy and yet feel so horrible. I decided to share it will all spoonies in the hopes that it might touch your soul in some way or another.
I got sand between my joints,
daggers in my shoulder blades,
and calves that feel like burning coal.
I got a goodnight's rest,
yet I still feel like I ran a marathon,
no amount of napping will help.
I hear how lucky I am to be young,
but this body feel so old,
They don't understand because it's invisible.
I can be skipping today, running tomorrow,
and in an instant be asking,
where have all my spoons gone?
Hot one minute, cold the next,
no it's not this and this I got it checked,
I promise, I'll be fine.
When people think it's in your head,
You're being dramatic you're a fake,
They don't understand because it's invisible.
I can't do today, what I did yesterday,
Sometimes I feel like such a burden,
I forgot who I was for so long.
It's exhausting to look normal,
when your normal feels wrong,
but I remember I need to be strong.
I say I'm fine, to ease their mind,
this disease I'm fighting is hard,
it's ok they don't understand because it's invisible.
This picture was taken from the site listed above. It is not mine.
